Be Kind to Yourself

I picked this beautiful inspiration from a past Deepak Chopra & Oprah meditation challenge.

Currently holidaying in Mexico, we've found the local people to be so friendly and welcoming. Do you find when people give and you receive, you can't help but want to give back?

We know the experience of feeling and receiving unconditional love, such as a parent to a child or a husband to his wife. But are we aware of when or how we give unconditional love? And what about unconditional love to ourselves?

There certainly have been moments in the past where my self-talk (you know, the voice inside your head or the conversations you have with yourself?), hasn't always been the most positive or loving or kind. 

I make a promise to myself to practice meditation daily, but what if I've skipped a day or even a few days in between practices for whatever reason? What would you do? Do you beat yourself up? Be hard on yourself or tell yourself you suck or are hopeless? Or can you be kind to yourself and just let the situation go and whatever is, just BE?

I firstly had to learn to create some self-awareness of when I might beat myself up or put myself down for not achieving or doing or living up to my own intentions or expectations. Creating that awareness then made me become aware that it's equally important to be kind to ourselves and allow ourself to make a mistake now and again. We are all humans BEINGS after all and imprefect in every beautiful way - we too need to give oursleves a little UNCONDITONAL self-LOVE. 

At the moment, my body is rapidly changing with my pregnancy. Now if I look at myself in a mirror and might say, OMG, I'm looking a bit fat/big/huge... if I do, I can quickly CHOOSE to stop myself from thinking that way, CHANGE my MINDSET and express some unconditional love towards myself - choose to love being pregnant and admire at how my baby is growing instead. Amazing what shift that makes. Might even put a smile on your face :)

The more we give ourselves a little self-love, the more we are also able to create more unconditional love to give AND feel/receive unconditional love back. If you're not feeling the love, why not start with you first? :) 

Imagine how much happier you could be feeling!

Find Your Inner Energy

This is such a great quote!!

Recently I've been feeling a bit flat and a bit less motivated than usual. Now I know, that when I'm that little bit more irritable (ok, I accept, there are the pregnancy hormones at play here but let's not use them as an excuse!) - then I know I've not been giving enough to myself. 

It's really important to look after No.1 - yes, that's right - YOU! and I don't mean this in a selfish way. Wayne W. Dyer says it well - by giving to yourself first, showing yourself some self-love, self-respect, self-compassion, then you're more able to give to others. You are definitely a better person and did I mention happier too?!? :)

Once we've fulfilled our needs of nourishing ourselves, then we're much better at coping with everything else that comes our way.  I know I'm a much more giving, understanding, energetic, patient and LOVING human BEING which allows me to do what I love to do and give back and be there for others. Whether that be to have the energy to uplift my husband after he's had a tiring hard day at work or be it that I can be a good listener to a friend who needs to offload her problems for a different perspective.

What you choose to give to yourself will be different for everyone. My suggestion would be to find something small that you can do regularly or daily that gives you more energy.  

It could be creating a habit for daily meditation, treating yourself to wholesome food and making sure you're eating well for the week - fuelling your body with nutritious food like green smoothies, or walking regularly after work to clear your head and to breathe in fresh air.  It could be a commitment to increasing your yoga sessions to more than once a week or start that gratitude journal you've been meaning to and commit to writing in it everyday. Some might treat themselves to a massage, a mani & pedi or a weekend away.

What ever it is, you do it because it's for you.  No one else.  Just for you!

Call these "self-loving" moments :)

If you're feeling uncomfortable about giving to yourself, perhaps try this exercise:

1. Look at yourself in the mirror
2. Now say "I LOVE YOU" to yourself - feel what comes up for you, does it feel good? uncomfortable?
3. Repeat steps 1 & 2
4. Repeat step 3 - keep repeating it until you're comfortable with saying it to yourself
5. Try it again the next day

Embrace It!

Earlier this year we were in Bali doing a 7 day surf & yoga retreat with Salt Retreats - Amazing experience by the way if you ever decide to try it! The retreat was small but the people we met were amazing - fun and just really down to earth.  One of the things I remember is one of the girls saying was "Embrace It" and I've since carried it with me.

When we allow and accept what is, we definitely feel a little more relief, release and happier.  When we try to fight against something - a situation, person etc - we tend to end up feeling more stressed, frustrated, unaccepting, controlling - the list goes on! 

A chat with my mentor, Mia Munro, not too long ago, made me realise that for a long time my journey has been about 'letting go' - yes, one might say, I too wanted to be in control of my own life (like all aspects!) - now I'm not saying don't be responsible for your own life, because you are, but if you add a little bit of 'letting go' in there with some of the 'control'...well... the feeling is just completely different.

For me, with my current circumstances, I've had my husband tell me many times "embrace it" (the pregnancy) and I'm certainly doing a lot of allowing and accepting.  Just on the weekend, I've totally just had to allow and accept that my body is changing, there is no rule when or how much it will change in whatever time frame, so I've just got to embrace it.  I'm talking about the fact that I had to go out and buy maternity pants!  Just getting into my forth month, you're only really just starting to show!  You read lots of stuff about wearing loose or stretchy clothes.  Yup that totally worked for me from the second month and I stored away my skinny jeans and lived in my leggings, but a shop with my mum found me making the switch - and oh my goodness, they felt so good! It's such a different feeling. 

Now I could be all depressed about it that I'm getting bigger, losing my petite shape and having to wear maternity wear so early on OR I could and have totally embraced it. I've shown me a little self-love and respect - more about that another time!  It makes me love being pregnant!   In fact, it's made it more fun as I get to look at a new wardrobe!  

so let's just sit with that thought for today....

What are you trying to 'control' that's not working for you?  What would happen if you allow things to be as they are, or to accept that person for who they are?  

We can't control everything - think about it - you can't tell the sun when to wake up, right?  As they say, when in Rome, do as the Romans do!